Loading ...Paying for the date.
Relationships — By Original Mgbeke on July 9, 2009 1:23 pm
It’s the year 2009 and with each passing year, more ‘Independent Women’ anthems seem to be hitting the airwaves. We ladies are feeling like ‘we got our own’ and in general, feeling more financially independent.
Which brings me to the topic of today…
As we dey here, dey do ‘Ms. Independent’, are we adopting that same approach to dating and relationships? Specifically, I am curious as to which stage in the courting process, if at all do you ladies offer to pay for the date?
Imagine if an object of interest is courting you, and wining and dining you, and let’s assume that you guys have been on about 4 dates so far. By the 5th date, do you feel like you should reach into your wallet and at least offer to pay for the date, or do you feel that if a man is wining, dining and courting you, it is his financial responsibility to pay for all your dates?
Granted, this mentality of women offering to pay for dates or going dutch appears to be pretty westernized, seeing that if you are dating a man in Nigeria, it is very unlikely that he will even entertain the idea of a woman offering to pay for the date.
And of course, I’m not going to leave the guys out of this one so I will remix the question and throw it right back at y’all. If you’ve taken your object of interest out on 5 dates, and by the 6th date she has made no moves to reach into her wallet, or at least offer to pay for the date, how would you view this?
If a woman offered to pay for a date, would you be insulted?
And more importantly, would you ever ask a woman to go dutch with you on a date?
Ladies and Gentlemen, let’s discuss.
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Tags: dating, Dating etiquette, men, money, Relationships, women
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26 Comments
Let me explain….
When asked out on a date…I always pick a place I can afford to take myself. I never leave my house without money and I drive to any date…that’s right…no picking Goldie up from her house…she doesnt know you like that…
Another thing is…I never assume you got it…I will ask BEFORE the date whose treat it is…most times, if I pick the place…I will automatically try and pay…
I believe in going somewhere for drinks…another place for dinner and another for after dinner drinks/dessert…at the end of dinner, I may offer to take you somewhere else for dessert…if you focus on who will pay…you give that “power” to be an issue or an uncomfortable situation…that’s just my take on it…
I believe that a man should pay the first date and perhaps two more dates after that. The woman should have the common decency/ courtesy to offer to pay or even go dutch, paying the tip would score points too. What us men are looking from women is a show of appreciation and respect. This disparity in thinking only translates into the enormous number of divorces each year… Women tend over advertise themselves as very much independent, being independent is not just taking care of yourself its also showing that you can help your boyfriend or husband with financial matter on an equal playing ground. What happens in many cases is that while our bank accounts seem to get smaller theirs seem to get bigger…because they seem to just think of themselves “What can he do for me mentality”.
Those women who seem to take the approach of letting the man take care of the date each and every time end up single for a very long time, because they forget to realize that it is your actions and not your beauty that is going keep a guy around. Just be a little thankful for what we do for you as opposed to just taking, taking and taking. That is all for now and hope that perhaps this was an informative tid bit.
A.
So I always offer to pay, even on the first date, if the guy is dum enough to accept my offer on the first date. Well, it’ll be the last date! And he should pay for the second, by the third it depends on the rest of the dating situation, where we go, who picked the place e.t.c/